Oh, the life of children

Why mother? Why do you block my way into the kitchen with a dirty babygate? I must throw myself at it so I can get back to the business of climbing up my sister's stepstool onto the kitchen counter and trying to eat salt and grab knives. Why would you stop me? I just want to eat paper and climb on the couch and knock the speakers over. I'm just trying to be me. Oh man, sister. I cannot believe you dressed me up like this. I am so going to get you back some day. On the other hand, I love the attention.